Fresh prizes

Dear gang-bangers of the world, and members of the mafia.

In the event that I treat you or your close friends and/or family psychologically, and Cierra and Corinne treat you or your close friends and/or family medically, or Rebecca prescribes you drugs, or Katrina preforms some inappropriately timed Christmas songs.

THESE are the lavish prizes and gifts we would like to receive from you.

Ahem...

1. Our own Hawaiian islands (each)

2. Fancy jewels and such

3. Everything out of the Anthropologie catalog.

4. A Steve Madden store being our own personal shoe closets.

5. The itunes company. Unlimited music forever.

6. A nice italian restaurant.

7. Personal masseuse

8. Give me ownership of McDonalds (i just want the money, not the crappy food)

9. Our kids get automatic acceptance to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, (and if you wouldn't mind finding our own obviously misplaced acceptance letters too, that would be cool)

10. The following people to be delivered to us on a silver platter: Eminem for Cierra, Gaspard Ulliel for Brittany, Zac Efron for Corinne, Chace Crawford for Rebecca, and Sufjan Stevens for Katrina. Plus. Also Natalie Portman, Emma Watson, Emma Stone, Blake Lively, and Scarlett Johanssen. To be our best friends.

11. Gregory House. I don't know why. Just House. nuff said.

12. Personal servant, I mean butler, for moments like these when all we want is hot bread and jamba juice.

13. Barney Stinson. To keep us on our A game. Also, please please make Neil Patrick Harris straight.

14. Make my dreams come true. Kthanks :)

15. Oh and we would also really enjoy some JetPuffs.

These are the prices of our personal professional services. If you have crazy brain problems, need babies delivered, or brain surgery, or drugs, or a live performance of Santa Baby, we are open for business :)